This time of year the ground is still pretty cold here, and it’s not unusual to find toads buried deep into the soil. If we have any digging to do, we dig very cautiously. So that’s why a few days ago I was using my hands and a small trowel to dig a hole for the hosta I was planting. We’ve really worked hard on improving the soil in this particular garden, so it is rock free, soft, and easy to dig.

I was making great progress digging the large hole I needed when suddenly I realized that I was holding a soft, moving “something” in one hand. So I did what any normal person would do under those circumstances and let out a piercing scream. My husband came running over to see what had happened. Unfortunately, one of our neighbors was walking past just as I screamed, and he was curious too.

Several minutes later, after the explanations had been made and my level of embarrassment had lowered a bit, I went back to planting my hostas. And somehow, even though I had already dug up one toad, and I was fully expecting that I might find more… when my hand closed on another soft, moving body, I screamed again! As luck would have it, the neighbor had finished his walk and was on his way back past our house again and was just opposite me when I screamed. This always dignified and very reserved elderly man was so startled he actually jumped into the air, which made him almost as embarrassed as I was. This time he didn’t stay around to ask for an explanation! I’m not the least bit squeamish at handling toads, and I’m not normally a screamer, but somehow feeling their bodies moving and pulsating in soil that shouldn’t be moving is scream provoking, even if you’re somewhat expecting it to happen.

Because it is still cool, the toads aren’t fully active yet, and eventually they burrowed back down into the soil. It’s fascinating to watch them sink out of sight… it looks like they are disappearing into quicksand.

More toad encounters… Frog, Bullfrog, or Toad?, Eastern American Toad,
Tiny Eastern American Toads.

Extended butter is easy to make. Just beat one half cup of lukewarm water into one softened stick of butter. If you use a mixer, start slowly to prevent splattering. Add small amounts of water at a time and keep beating until the water is thoroughly incorporated into the butter. The mixture will be smooth and fluffy, and you will end up with one cup of soft butter. After this soft butter is refrigerated, it will become as firm as regular butter. I make up only one stick at a time and usually store the butter covered in a stainless steel measuring cup that lost its handle some time back. If your preferences run to something fancier, try shaping it or putting it in a pretty dish. This butter will also pick up detail nicely from a mold.

More recently, we have noticed that many of their prices are no longer competitive and that many of the other stores have begun stocking the same items. And although there are still some foods, like a certain soy-free cheese, that we can’t find anywhere else, the $45 annual membership fee at BJ’s doesn’t seem as reasonable as it used to. When our membership ran out this past January, we decided not to renew it. Although we would continue to purchase the few items we can’t find anywhere else, we would buy them with a day pass at the ten percent higher non-member price.

We had stocked up pretty thoroughly before our membership expired, so we didn’t have to shop at BJ’s again until a couple of weeks ago. As my husband went through the checkout, he was asked for his membership card, and when he said that we had let our membership expire in January, he was urged to sign up as a new member and take advantage of the current new membership offer of fourteen months for only $35. The deal also included a ten dollar coupon that could be redeemed on that day’s purchases, making the actual membership fee only $25. When my husband signed up for the new membership, the deal didn’t end there. They also threw in a free bunch of bananas, which he accepted, and the offer of various free items from the store bakery and a huge booklet of product coupons for processed foods, which he did not.

So for the next year we’re back to being a buyer’s club member. We already know that we will not be rejoining next year at the full membership price. And I wonder why the membership renewal offers are never as generous as those offered to new members.

This isn’t the end of this story, though. A few weeks later I was half-listening to the local news, and I recognized one of the voices in the interview as the voice of the man who had hugged me in the store (I have this thing about never forgetting a voice), and it turns out that this man was one of the candidates for state senator! No wonder he and his wife looked so anxious when they saw me coming toward them accompanied by an obviously angry husband… and no wonder they were so relieved when we all looked at each other and at the jackets and hair and laughed at the obvious mistake.

He won the election, by the way, and the next time my husband and I were in Wal-Mart, my husband put his arm around me at one point. Without looking, I leaned back against him and said, “Congratulations on winning the election, Senator…” and we both burst out laughing.

You probably had to be there.